By the time you’re a freshman, you’ve had enough with your parents picking you up. We all have experienced the days where you parents are an hour late to pick you up, or when they come out of their car and make an absolute fool of themselves. It’s truly a disgrace for the child.

The parent belongs in the car, and only in the car. Even at 3 p.m, they still haven’t put on “real” clothes. Tie-dye yoga clothes are out of fashion, mothers. And please don’t wear any see-through shirts or pants. One more thing, parents, don’t pull your pants up past your stomach, thats where your shirt belongs. KEEP YOUR FLY ZIPPED AT ALL TIMES! There really should be a uniform for the mothers, not the students.

Another reason students can’t wait to drive is because of freedom. You can hop in your car, and cruise down the road without your parents ever knowing. You don’t have to plan to be picked up at 3:00, and you don’t have to call and text them saying you decided to stay until 4:00. Life becomes so simple. You  don’t even have to be a part of awkward conversations in the car:

Mother: How was your day?

Kid: Good.

Mother: Do you have any homework?

Kid: Yeah.

Mother: So you had a good day, huh?

Kid: Yeah

No-one enjoys those conversations. Even listening to classical music is better than them. All we can do is look forward to that one birthday.

So, with that said…. Happy early 15th birthday! It IS coming.